G.I. Jane... watch it, but don't expect much.

When I first sat down to watch GI Jane, I was sitting in Chris' room, blazed out of my mind, and, well.. we just watched the workout scenes. Over and over and... over again. Amazing. So while I sat in my house today, sober and bored out of my skull, I decided to watch the whole movie, from beginning to end. It was a lot different than what I expected. I mean, firstly, I figured that there would be more workout and shower scenes. But I didn't expect the "friendly" sexism and homophobia that came with the movie as well.

For those of you that don't know, G.I. Jane is a movie about a woman named Jordan O'Neill who undergoes Navy SEAL training as a test case to see whether or not women can serve in combat. In the beginning of her training, it is obvious that there is a double standard, and she confronts her higher officers about it, convincing them to treat her just as equally as one of the guys. In order to prove that she is serious about the training, she even shaves her head (gasp), moves into the same sleeping quarters as the men (double gasp), and has a ten minute montage of her doing one handed push ups (!!!).

Meanwhile, her boyfriend back home, who is also apart of the Navy (but not in training with her) is concerned, fast forward button... One of the hardest training scenes is the SERE training, which is an enactment of what it's like to be in combat- they get "kidnapped" and she gets beat up by her master in chief... yadda.. she basically gets her ass kicked, but manages to become "one of the guys" when, instead of giving up, she tells her master in chief to suck her dick. ("Suck my dick." - Lt. O'Neil) The guys all respond with cheers and hooga hooga hoogas ("Hooga, hooga, hooga!"- SEAL trainees) and then they go out for drinks.

After going out for drinks with the fellas, Lt. O'Neil goes to a late night barbeque with a fellow woman officer (also not in training- idk what she actually did, but it wasn't combat). This part of the movie is a bit fuzzy, but I am PRETTY SURE that this other woman is a total lez and is hitting on GI Jane something fierce. Besides, the BBQ ended up being an all women's party on the beach, where they drank beer and had a gay ole time.

So, while all of this is happening, the woman Texas senator is blackmailed to make GI Jane fail, so she has a photographer take some pictures. These pics get back to GIJ's superiors, they accuse her of being a lez, GIJ refuses this, she is asked to leave, she goes home and makes out with her man (remember, she is NOT a homo) she confronts the senator who makes it all go away.. fast forward... GI Jane is back in action! And then the trainees all see some action! They go to Libya and shoot at some brown people, Demi Moore saves the troops and finally earns her wings. There's a book, a look, and then some credits.

Whew.

Now here's my ish with the movie. It had a chance to grapple with some really tough issues: women in the military, LGBTQ people in the military, gender roles, even racism in the military. But instead it gives all of that up in order to show Demi Moore at bootcamp. I mean, yes, this was the 90's and Demi was still smokin, but come on! For example, while confronting the Texan senator, Demi's character "So you think women's lives are more valuable than men?" Apparently, the Texan's argument about why women shouldn't be allowed in the Navy SEALS is that they are too valuable. But GI Jane, can't you see that she wasn't belittling the value of a man's life, but instead in the scene was comparing women to property? Shouldn't the issue here be that women aren't being allowed to make their own decisions about what to do with their lives, and their careers?

Another issue is the "suck my dick" scene. This is obviously a pivotal moment in this movie. Oh my GAWD, Demi Moore just told him to SUCK her DICK! This is the moment where she really becomes one of the guys! But why not suck my clit? kiss my cunt? or even choke on my strap on? No?

Oh, and when it comes to race... I mean, the last fifteen minutes is then shooting and killing brown people in a brown country. However, there is also the token black soldier, Morris Chestnut, or "McCool" as he is known in the movie. On top of this, they have this fine black man give his nod of approval to GI Jane in a short monologue. He tells a sad story about how his grandfather was refused a position in the Navy because he was black. He then tells GI Jane : "So see O'Neil, i know where you're coming from, you're just the new nigger on the block." Hm. Well. A part of me wonders if they threw that in just so they could get away with saying "nigger" at least ONCE during GI Jane. Or maybe it's like how gay is the new black. Except she's not gay, because the movie also likes to reiterate this point as well. So... being a woman is the new black?

Finally.. the homos. Where are they? Why can't this main character be gay? And if she's not, why does the movie keep hitting us over the head with the fact that she's straight? One of the first shots of the movie is GI Jane in the bathtub, sharing suds with her manfriend. She makes a snooty remark about how they're probably going to think she's a dyke. Fast forward... they accuse her of being a dyke. She confronts them about it. (Are you accusing me of being a LEZbian?) They don't say yes, but they do say g'bye GI Jane. Then she goes home and makes out with her manfriend again. There are even hints of sexual tension between her and the Master Chier (or at least from him to her). And you know... more manfriend love. Okay. She's not gay. But instead of being so APPALLED at the IDEA of being a lez, you use this time to talk about the way that homosexuality is looked down on in the military, and how rumors of her being gay are enough to threaten her position in the SEALS (as well as "embarrass the navy", a quote from the anonymous blackmailing photographer)? What ever happened to the other woman officer? She was also called in, but you never find out if she's gay. Le sigh.

GI Jane. The cover was so hot. But you let me down. You tried, but missed the mark when talking about gender in the military. You also fucked up with sexuality and race, go figure. But what can you expect when this movie was made in 1997? It's 2009, and don't ask don't tell doesn't look like it's going anywhere. But.. at least we have a month now? I hope this rant made sense. If not, then I hope that it at least inspired you to watch the movie and write your own review. And few your viewing pleasure, Demi Moore shaving her head:



And Demi Moore being tortured, and then telling MIC to suck ittt..:



Wiki info about Don't Ask, Don't Tell: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Don%27t_ask,_don%27t_tell

Annnnd.. finally... Demi Moore Interview with ET about the movie:



It seems like in order to talk about her role as GI Jane, they also have to talk about Striptease. I know they came out one year after the other, but still... Look, you saw her cut off her hair, now let's make up for it by watching her take off her clothes!

Damn. Fuck this, I'm gonna go watch that one handed push up again...