oh so cold

its that time of year where people bundle up for warmth, but im still trying to cling onto the thread of hope that maybe it will get warmer. i see other people who, like me, are stuck in denial abt the weather, and walk around freezing in their hoodies and short sleeves. my friends , i think its time we face reality.

this weather is the type of weather that makes you sick, and in such a small environment, the flu bounces back and forth between people like a ball in a game of catch. as soon as youve gotten rid of it, there it is again, flying towards yr head in a blur of red plastic, and yr only option is to catch it. again.

ive noticed that everyone is constantly coughing. im not usually a cougher during the day, but my body feels like its possessed. im sure this is what the holy spirit feels like. cyree mentioned the other day that she coughs so much it feels like shes doing crunches daily- who needs the gym ever again? ive been communicating with people through coughs. in fact, i had a conversation with a fellow modmate today, and it went a little something like this:

me: hey can i borrow that *coughcoughcough*
them: yeah, its by the *coughcoughcough*
me: wait *cough* where? *cough* i dont see the *coughcoughcough*
them: did you look by the *coughcoughcough*
me:*coughcoughcoughcough*
them:*coughcoughcoughcough*

.... and this continued for abt five minutes until one of us just left the room.

the winter is especially hard for me because i am realizing more and more every dayt hat i am not equipped for the winter. even though i am (for the most part) a new englander, i dont rly have enough sweaters or hoodies, most of my shoes are flats or sandals, i own MAYBE two pairs of socks, three out of the four pair of tights i own are ripped and two out of the three pairs of jeans that i own are ripped. and on top of that, i lost my only flannel! i absolutely loved that flannel! my mother told me via email that she was going to send me up some boots and some money and i almost cried tears of joy. i responded to her email by saying

OMG MOM YES THANKS I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!

im hoping that i played it smooth and didnt seem too desperate.

i went to the justice for jason rally today in chuckswithnosocks, and after abt 2 hrs of standing outside in the bitter cold, i felt like my legs were attached to rocks. i couldn't feel my feet at all. by the time that i got home, i tore off my shoes and saw that parts of my feet had turned blue. i didnt think that it could really happen to me- im black! i didnt think i could see blue through the melanin! but there it was... my feet still feel rly cold and i put socks on and changed my shoes!

these are hard times. everyone i know keeps stealing gloves and hats and scarves. im just waiting to go home so my mommy can buy me some- im broke and rly bad at stealing, so ill just wait. it sure is cold though.